From Distraction to Growth: Overcoming Avoidance in Pursuit of Happiness



Lifestyle | Mental Health | Stress



February 26, 2024

Have you ever heard the saying ‘you can’t heal what you don’t feel?’ I’m not sure of its origin, but you’ll find it often quoted in articles about stress, health, trauma, and grief. Emotional numbness is both a coping mechanism and a barrier to embracing change. Even when that change could liberate us from the stress we are avoiding.

Staying busy with work and other commitments is a common coping response in difficult times. It is made especially easy by the culture of distraction which is modern living. Markets have monetised avoidance. The moment we feel anything that isn’t ‘good vibes only’ we’re encouraged to consume social media, fast food, quick fixes and anything that gives us a quick dopamine fix.

Exercise undermines our quick fix habitual behaviours; it might even lead us to feel feelings we hadn’t realised were just beneath the surface. The kind that if we don’t eventually feel, they will manifest as illness or chronic stress. Unlike quick fixes, it also takes time to build the habit, and some days you simply wont want to do it. You might be tempted to go home and get the quick fix from a glass of wine instead because – ‘I deserve it’, ‘its been a hard day’.

The question is, do you deserve it? Do you deserve to be denied the kind of growth, pride and self-esteem building opportunities that come from experiencing meaningful change? Do you deserve to be denied what it feels like to be truly healthy, rested and in command? No. Nobody does. However, there is no denying that its hard to simply wake up one day and say, ok now I will do the hard stuff and feel the things I’ve been avoiding while also fulfilling my usual commitments.

That is why there are two simple but life changing things you need to do if you’re trapped in a habit of avoidance and quick fix dopamine hunting. Firstly, acknowledge where you are. Secondly, get help. That looks different for different people, so consider what you’re ready and willing to do but make sure its enough to shift your inertia.

Maybe change for you is a Psychologist or Counsellor, a Coach, a walking buddy, a journal, a therapy group, regular massage or a combination of these. Whatever it is, the key is to start and commit. You CAN go slow and at your pace once you get started, you just need to rip the Band-Aid off first. You never regret a workout and you’ll never regret improving your life for the better.

Fitness Revolution in Bassendean welcomes everybody but specialises in the over 40’s in a fun and safe environment. Learn more about our personal and group training.

Founder/Director Nicky McKimmie